The Accidental Bloggist

rdf? May 14, 2008

rodents of dyspeptic fortitude?   residual detritus forgotten?    this is not a bad remake of the Princess Bride, is it.   time for index cards.   oh, sorry – – tfic.

did you see on the tornado warnings last night that there is a small community in Oklahoma called IXL?   no one seems to know what it stands for – but information-crossed lovers must live there with their insane expert language. 

as the one who looks under the rocks of technology May 7, 2008

it occurs to me that part of the reason the dire predictions about Y2K did not come to pass is largely due to the fact that people did take it seriously enough to do something about it.   a few nervous types like myself began raising the hue and cry in the 1990s.   people responded, demanded action and patches were put in place.   SAVED!   I would remind you that a crisis averted does not mean there was no crisis pending.

I bite, sting, and generally irritate.   so squish me already, but at least roll over and open one eye.   then consider if I deserve squishing.   btw – just because the rumor of global warming was created by a California sydicate and a bunch of tree loving intellectuals does not mean that we should continue to embrace hummers as our national method of transportation.   OUCH. 

bang or whimper, either way is pretty bad, wouldn’t you say?

you’re welcome, oh Librarians.  now put me up in the hero’s hall and bring my meals.

why taking cues from a business model to make changes in the library is a bad thing May 3, 2008

ross perot.  campaigned for president on the promise of making federal government function like a business.  Strategic Planning!  Fiscal Responsibility!   sounds great.  especially to all those mean old Republicans with all their money.  

but ross forgot about the poor, the elderly, the babies and their mothers in his paradigm.  he forgot about the guy who fell from a ladder while working as a painter and incurred a head injury.  not to mention the artists who will NEVER turn a fast profit for the corporation of the body politic, but enrich our society in some unfathomable way all the same.   as do Libraries…  

all ross asked of the American public was to join him in the chant “what’s in it for me RIGHT NOW!”   undoubtedly, an appealing prospect amongst the day-trading and tractor-pulling crowd.   the smarter we get the dumber we fall.

the trouble with Ayn Rand – there is no compassion in her matrix.  you produce, you’re the poo.   you fail, well you are set out on a rock and you die.

oh, Just Librarians! look at the period of history in which all the anti-trust legislation came into vogue!   the Bolshevik Revolution scared the shit out of the status quo – J. P. Morgan, Hearst, Pulitzer, Getty, Rockefeller.  the American nobility.  even Teddy himself – and yes, Andrew Carnegie.   why do you think they jumped on philathropy for their salvation in their lonesome latter years?  they made a killing in that “splendid little war.”   Suddenly, it all turned on a dime.

there’s a hole in the world like a great big pit….  why did they remake Sweeny Todd in 2007 – does it not strike you as telling?

why can’t we allow libraries go down this yellow brick road?   indeed, oh librarians.   It Lacks Much. 

the mummy that won’t die May 1, 2008

so, if you are hanging on to hear out the mummy story “came out” –

first, a bit of background.  my son had to create an Egyptian tomb with all the accoutrement, replete with mummified figure in a sarcophagus.   THAT’S WHAT I SAID.   it’s not like I can go out and shop at Teacher’s-Pet Emporium or Tuts-R-Us.  

went to Hobby Lobby for crazy assortment of art crap.  got out for under $20, barely.  we got a styrofoam hot dog container from QT for the sarcophogus.  it actually was very cool when finished.

but the piece-de-resistance was the mummy.   oh yeah.   we made a mummy.   it was a wadded tin foil “body” held together with toothpicks.  James cut a cloth handerchief into strips and I made a paste of water and flour.  I added coffee to the mixture to give it an aged linen look.   it was a nasty mess.   but after wrapping it around the body, have to admit it looked pretty dern mummified.  it was very soggy though, so I put in on a piece of wax paper and set it outside on the patio table to dry out in the wind.  

this took all us ALL day Saturday – the trip to Hobby Lobby alone took 2 hours.  not one word did mommy write of her book review, not one room did she vacuum, not one item of laundry did she fold.   we had no clean place at the table to sit and eat, but it was awesome.   James was really proud of it and hopeful of a good grade.

we went to church Sat. night and without thinking I put Sophie outside.   Sophie is our stupid dog.   I mean that in the nicest way, she is the sweetest animal God ever put on the earth.   when you come home, she wags her whole butt all the way up to her shoulders, she is just so happy to see you.  I love Sophie.  but she is not very bright.

Sophie ate the mummy.   tin foil and all.   not even a toothpick was left.    we figure it smelled like bread to her.   not that it matters, she eats all sorts of stuff like the bottom half of a wooden door.   Sophie ate my son’s tin foil and linen homework.   and I was scared to death that the rags would coagulate in her stomach and cause and obstruction.

so Sunday we make another mummy.   put it on TOP of the fridge far from the leaping Sophie.   since then, I’m feeling her nose to see if it’s hot like every half hour.  feeling her tummy to see if it’s tender and looking in her big brown eyes.   anyone with a mixed breed shepard -mutt knows that look they give you when they tilt their head sideways and their ears poke up like “wtf??”  – so I’m laughing at me, laughing at Sopie – and watching the back yard for the final passage of the mummy.  

so far, no luck.  but no fever and she seems to feel fine.   anyone with a dog out there, how long can this take?    should I give her, like, castor oil or something?   It’s not like she’s a picky eater……….